Roller Coaster

I feel like I am on a roller coaster....I know that no matter what, I am blessed and things will be fine...but I can't help thing in the back of my mind "you have cancer, you have cancer"...I just seem too young to have cancer...Christa was too young, my friend Julie who is the bravest person I know was too young...and so I feel like a brat making a big deal of this...so I have told people here and there...and on this blog, but I have mixed emotions because I know from everything Christa went through and all the research she has done, that everything is ok.

..but from my pity party self, I just want to scream...THIS SUCKS....I probably have cancer...I probably having something they will have to remove, I will have to take medicine 30 minutes every day before I even eat one thing of food....The other part of me says, stop Corrin...quit being ungrateful...it could be way worse...this is like a hangnail compared to some people's problems...buck up, and be grateful that you have a WONDERFUL, blessed life....

I'm not going to lie, these last few days and weeks have been up and down...I am stressed trying to get all of my counseling internship stuff done...I'm stressed because I want to be skinny (I know, I'm shallow...at least I get it!)....I'm stressed because my family-sisters- have been fighting like cats and dogs lately....you think you grow out of it, but you don't. I'm stressed because my house never seems to be organized...I clean and clean ( plus I have a cleaning lady....I know, I am a brat) and it still is always in shambles...

Ok, I am done complaining... I generally am not a glass half empty type of person...I rationalize to  myself that I have this one moment of "poor me time"....SOOOOOO my doctor appointment is tomorrow at 2pm...I kept thinking all day they may call me today with "bad news"....My awesome neighbor is picking Isabella up.  Dave is coming home early to pick me up for my appointment.  No matter the news, I am very grateful....Life is good!!!!!!!

And...I got my new Star Furniture bedroom furniture in...first, real adult furniture:)

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